prayer support
Honoring birth families
Honoring birth families in their conversation, and stories they tell the kids. Being able to show love and mercy when interacting with birth families who have often placed children in harm. Being a light to them--showing Jesus in our interactions.
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FEELINGS OF SAFETY
Feelings of safety for the kids and the foster family they live with. Change, new environments, and new people are overwhelming for all of us, let alone when we add abuse, substance abuse, grief, and anxiety to the mix.
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WISDOm in parenting
Wisdom in parenting style and paradigm shifts--Parenting kids who have traumatic experiences in their current and past lives often requires a paradigm shift in your parenting style. The child’s needs and fragility level are different than a child who has not come from a hard place. Foster/adoptive parents need wisdom in how to best connect with their children and adapt their home structure to the needs of their newly placed kids.
When to ask for help
Asking for help is challenging; we do not always recognize our need and we are on the way to burn-out. Pray that the foster/adoptive parents in our community recognize when they need help or support from friends, family, their church, or professionals.
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Patience
Healing, bonding, adjusting, acceptance, peace all come softly and often seems to be in a “one step forward four steps backward” kind of rhythm. Pray for the Holy Spirit to pour patience into the hearts of all family members. May they be slow to speak and quick to listen to one another and to the Lord’s nudges. Each day needs a dose of more patience than the day before, and this can only be fruitful if from our Creator. The children need patience with new parents, and the parents with the kiddos.
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Healing (parents and kiddos)
As followers of the God who parted the Red Sea and laid His hands on a dead man and brought him back to life, we believe in miracles and His healing power. Pray that the youth in these homes would heal from the trauma (abandonment, abuse, substance abuse, fear, chronic stress, anxiety) they have lived through. Pray for the eyes of the foster/adoptive parents to be opened to see evidence of this healing even when it is painfully slow, and may they receive healing in their own hearts from the pain of this journey. Pray for healing within the biological family’s hearts over the loss they have endured and the shame for what they may have caused—may they find Jesus’s face in all this tragedy.
Attachment
Attachment takes time, consistency, and effort regardless of the age children are when they come to live with a new family. A child attaching to their new family will be a catalyst for his/her attachment in all future relationships. It is an essential piece to them living a healthy connected life.
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Connectivity
A common phrase in the foster/adoption world is “connect before you correct”—focusing on connecting with the children in the home as opposed to focusing on behavior change. This is a challenging concept when your home is thrown into chaos—however this is how trust is built.
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Peace in the home and hearts
Lasting peace comes from our Heavenly Father, and it transcends all understanding, chaos, stress, and pain. It is a mark of the Lord and a testimony to the outside world as well as to the kids in the home.
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court
May all who are present in the courtroom have the child’s best interest at heart—shift the goals of the room to be child centered. Pray for truth to be revealed and then ruled on. That self-centered motives of all parties would be left at the door, and that God’s will for this child (even if we do not understand it) would come to be!